Tuesday, September 16, 2008

My phone call from my Pediatrician's Office

Ring Ring

Me: "Hello"

Sharon: "Hi. It's Sharon from the peditrician's office. We need Dovi's waist/hip measurement"

Me: "Why? Are you custom tailoring him a suit?" (man I'm funny)

Sharon: "No, the State of Illinois needs it to give him diapers"

Me: "But they've been giving him diapers for over two years! Why do they need it now?"

Sharon: "Who the heck knows"

Me: "I shall measure his cute little hips and waist when we all get home."

Sharon: "Thanks, bye"

Me: "Bye"

Seriously? And we wonder why Illinois is in such a budget crisis. I've been sitting here racking my brain. WHY on earth do they need his waist/hip measurement? It's not like THEY are ordering him the diapers. I am! And I don't seem to need it, being as I have successfully been ordering Dovi's diapers for the past two years without that critical piece of information. But the silly, silly State of Illinois finds it necessary to
  • spend the time writing a letter to the doctor to request this vital information
  • spend a stamp to mail it and
  • enclose a pre-stamped envelope for the pediatrician's office to mail back said measurement
And we HONESTLY wonder why the State of Illinois has no money in its budget?

And now, my faithful readers, for your viewing pleasure, a few photos:

My floor, post dinner. I swear. What is wrong with my children? Are they not able to eat a meal without almost half of it ending up on my floor? Yet another reason we might need to get D that dog...but knowing my luck, eating all that food off the floor would cause said dog to develop high cholesterol and diabetes, necessitating medication and insulin shots.
The pile was so large that I put my cordless phone on the floor to serve as a reference point. No, this is not a mini phone. It's a standard size cordless phone. And that's a pile of food on the floor as long and as tall as said phone.

A blurry picture of THE Chai Lifeline Jibbit. Should I start an eBay auction for it, with all the proceeds going to Chai to Chai Lifeline? Watcha think? oh and do you like my countertop (what the Jibbit is sitting on)? I painted them myself :)


elana said...

i think more food ends up on the floor than in my kids mouth too. and by the way u r way too talented for me. i can barely draw a straigt line.

Anonymous said...

What exactly is a Jibbit?
FYI, I think the garbage is a hereditary thing from my side of the family. We all seem to be able to manufacture garbage!

Shosh said...

1) "Are you custom tailoring him a suit?" Hahaha. Hysterical.
2) Your broom is awesome
3) Imagine if you had taken a picture of that mess my kids made on your might have needed numerous phones

fdmom said...

Hey Sara - just have to tell you that I subscribed to your blog with a RSS feed (still don't really get what that is).

I've known you for what 8-10 yrs now. But, I guess I ddin't really know you. You're blogs are hilarious. With the sketch "comedy" of our lives - we can only take it day by day & with some laughter thrown in.

love ya - Barrie

DESJ and Company said...

You too can buy that broom (and a selection of many other ones just like it)from Marshalls for $5.99. And of course you know I left it in the picture b/c it is so fab.

Kelly said...

Love the broom too!!!

The pile of crumbs does not suprise me at all. I have very messy eaters too. My mistake is that often I sweep it up and then get distracted and don't throw it in the garbage fast enough before someone runs through it and I have to sweep all over again. I hope you are more efficient than me.

DESJ and Company said...

I generally spend the entire time I'm sweeping yelling:

"Do not ride your scooter in here! Out! Out! Get out!"

For some dumb reason I let them ride their Razors in the house.