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Tuesday, November 23, 2010

A Giggle for the Day

Yes, it is less than 36 hours before Dovi's Bar Mitzvah. Yes, I have much to do (well, not really that much)

But I must tell you this story.

So as many of you know, berets are very in the the frum fashion world. I have fallen head over heels for this new trend-I can buy berets anywhere, and heck! they are like trendy snoods. I'm in.

I've been buying most of my snoods at my favorite accessory store, Forever 21. And while much of the clothing there looks like it's made for size 0 streetwalkers, the accessories are fabulous. No offense to the people who shop at Forever 21. I'm sure there is clothing there that is very appropriate. It just takes a bit of effort to find said clothing. But I love, and I mean LOVE, the accessories. Headbands for Shana (her headband for the big day is from there), and berets and costume jewelery for me. Love.

So today I was wearing a beret from there. The elastic is a tad stretched out, so I pin it in the back to make it fit me I'm sure many of you know where this is going....

I went to Walgreens. I bought coffee creamer (on sale with coupons, of course). I went out to my car. As I was opening my car and chatting on the phone, I happened to look at myself in the reflection of my van window. At which point I realized that

I HAD NOTHING ON MY HEAD.

Yes, my hair was feeling the sun on it for the first time in almost 14 years.

I screamed (well not really), hung up the phone, and put on my hood. I then took off my sunglasses because I looked like I was about to rob the Walgreens, calmly went back in,

and found my beret lying in a little heap in front of the coffee creamer.

And no, I did not change my beret. I'm still wearing it now at midnight.

With my contact lenses.

Did I tell y'all I got lenses? I haven't worn them in 8 years but was ready for a change. I'm telling you, Bar Mitzvahing your son is a life changing endeavor.

Monday, November 15, 2010

Look What I Got!

So you all know about my friend Amy the photographer. She had her new little baby this summer-Max! Before Max arrived in all his 12 pounds 14 ounces glory, she came and took pictures of my little stinkers this summer.

Look what came on Friday!


Yes, it's a 3 feet tall and 2 feet wide canvas. Yes, I cry every time I see it.

If only my snood wasn't laying on the steps this would be a perfect picture.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Yes, Yes. I'm Still Alive

But I might get the title of The Worst Blogger in the Entire World Who Should Be Blogging All About Her Beloved Son Dovi's Upcoming Bar Mitzvah

which is in 19daysohmygdI'mfreakingoutIneedsomeofDovi'svaliumimmediatelybreathebreathebreathe

Wowza. It's soon. Like really, insanely, terrifyingly, heartstoppingly, waking up at night panic attackingly soon. Not like that's happening to anybody I know.

I have about 4,000 projects 90% done. But nothing, and I repeat NOTHING, is all the way done. It's not good for the psyche of the insane anal retentive blogger.

I wish I could tell you all about my projects. I really do. But that would ruin it for the people who are, ya know, coming, and deserve to be shocked by my amazing craftiness. Yes, I have been crafting the Bar Mitzvah. Did you expect anything different? And no, I am not paying for it with coupons. When Jewel still took expired coupons, I had visions of saving up all my Catalinas for like two years and ordering trays from Jewel and paying for them with insane stacks of Cats, but alas, that was not to be and we have a real caterer. Which will be much easier for me but much more expensive, which makes the thrifty coupon shopper in me throw up a little in my mouth.

Luckily I have wonderful friends and wonderful personal shoppers in New York (I WILL find out how much I owe you, and I WILL pay you back!) and hopefully we have almost everything we need. Yes, almost. Still not everything. Faint.

And no worries, I have an anatomy test on Thursday, as well as book fair for ESJ's school all this week. Yikes.

But on the upside, Dovi has really cute shoes for the Bar Mitzvah.