Things that make you go hmmmmmm.....

A boy in Elisha's class celebrated his birthday yesterday. I seem to be telling a few Elisha stories this week. He is rather entertaining. Aside from his new ever-so-lovely habit of breaking into the most annoying fake baby tears whenever anything does not go his way. And I mean anything. But I digress.

Back to the birthday.

This boy celebrated his birthday yesterday. And rather than a goody bag of random crap, he gave out one larger item.

It was a mini-basketball hoop. Elisha loves it. He brought it over to show me. The whole thing is about five inches wide by three inches tall. Made in China.

Here it is. Read it carefully.



Can you see what the little words are? Oh you can't? I'll help you.

New interesting body building.

IRRITATE!

Oh, you mean it's irritating when Elisha tries to slam dunk the ping pong ball sized ball and breaks the whole darned thing.

Why yes, it is. Thanks for the warning.

Hopefully he's bulked up his muscles, though.

I mean, it is both interesting and body building.

And irritating as well.

A little something got lost in translation, no?

It happened again

That Elisha of mine is a little thief very creative entrepreneur.

He came off the school bus holding a tightly wadded up dollar bill. Red warning lights flashed before my eyes again.

"Elisha, where'd you get that?"

Now he does have money (tooth fairy-darn if I received a quarter and was happy with it and these stinking ungrateful hoodlums get $1), but he knows that he's not allowed to take it to school.

"XXXXXX gave it to me"

"WHY?"

"He wanted to"

"Elisha, tell me the truth. Why did XXXXXX give you a dollar?"

"Well I didn't want my chips and he did. So I gave them to him. And he wanted to give me a dollar"

"Tomorrow, you will give that dollar back to XXXXX and tell him that you are sorry for taking the dollar from him. If you don't want your chips, you SHARE with him. You. may. not. sell. your. snacks. to. your. friends"

Tears, crying, drama. Dollar sent back to school this morning.

Now I'll have you all know that the chips in question were Pringles, from a 9 can s that I bought at Walgreens on clearance for a $.45 each with a $.10 coupon. So the cans were $.35 each. Paid for with my gift card. So frankly the child made 100% profit.

If we let Elisha run corporate America, maybe we wouldn't be in this recession.




And I know you're all waiting with baited breath to see my bathroom redo...I've wimped out on ripping out the vanity myself. Something about moving plumbing and installing brackets into studs has made me a little...nervous. But if you're handy and want to do it for me, please, don't be shy! But I do have other ideas...something might happen tonight. We'll see. Last night I was at Shosh's redoing her pictures. I think her hubby hates me.

The Latest...

Thank G-d,

Dovi seems to be back to normal!!!

He went to school yesterday and they told me he was a little sleepy. Today he actually took the bus on time and I have not gotten a call yet.

I seriously need a nap. Well I did fall asleep at 10:30 last night while watching a decorating show in bed. And it wasn't even a repeat-which must mean that I'm really tired.

But I realize that I haven't even told you guys about my loverly Saturday night. After almost 3 days on antibiotics and 3 days of Miralax, Dovi was still icky. Crisisy, no poop, etc.

His blood pressure was a stellar 180/130. I called my pediatrician. I swear, that woman is an angel. She takes such amazing care of all my kids, but for Dovi, she really goes above and beyond.

So she said that she really wanted us to go in to the ER to get him checked out-she wanted lots of blood work and an abdominal xray.

So we valiumed him up to get the blood pressure down, tylenoled him up to get rid of the fever, and headed out to the lovely ER.

Three hours, much blood work and many x-rays later, the declared him constipated. Thanks. We really appreciate that. His blood pressure was fine in the ER (well he was doped up on valium the whole time!) so they sent us home with advice to be patient and give the Miralax some more time.

At about 3 pm on Sunday our patience ran out and we dealt with the constipation more...ahem... aggressively. Dovi did not really approve of our choices. "Abba, why you do dat to me?" was one of his little gems.

But it worked and hopefully we're back to normal.

Don't worry, tomorrow will be a fun post :)

Not Me! Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.










This past week...

OK let's be honest. It's been a really, really crappy week in our house. But I'll try.

I did not completely forget about Not Me Monday until 8:30 on Sunday night...

I would never, have had almost an entire unplanned week off of work thanks to Dovi's lovely health issues.

I did not spend most of it planted on my butt on the couch.

I did not have a completely out of body experience while pulling up to my house-someone driving the exact same van that I drive, down to the missing front right hubcap (darn those potholes!) was NOT parked in my Dovi's handicapped space.

I did not actually look down at my steering wheel to confirm that yes, I was driving my Toyota Sienna and had not driven Benjie's car.

It was not a friend of ours dropping off something for us.

I did not purchase 42 cans of diced tomatoes last week. For $3.92. Who on earth needs 42 cans of diced tomatoes?

I did not make Dovi's counselor Raphi go down to my scary slasher basement to show him my food stockpile. What on earth made me think that a 21 year old guy would be interested in 60 boxes of cereal?

I did not somehow get my family into the museum, that should have cost $75 for $40. And have no idea how that happened.

OK I'm done. I tried, didn't I?

The Latest

Dovi is sooooo much better.

We kinda sorta helped him along in the bathroom department, and he had his Dovi twinkle in his eye back by about 6pm. Assuming he sleeps well overnight and wakes up in good spirits in the morning we are cautiously optimistic about sending him back to school tomorrow.

Elisha is fine. He's had two doses of antibiotics already and will have one more in the morning and will hopefully go to school on time too.

Here's to hoping for a calm, quiet normal week in which I repaint my bathroom.

You know me. Dovi stress = home redecorating.

Anyone out there know how to remove nasty disgusting green circa 1955 bathroom vanities and install pedestal sinks? If you do and feel the burning desire to help out a stressed out mama, drop me a line :)

But barring someone coming to help me (K, if you're reading this, isn't Y just DYING to come over???), I hope to merely paint the tile and walls, which will start me on the way to ridding the bathroom of the scary green-ness. Trust me. It's not a nice green.

Here's to hoping, folks!

I don't think I could make this up if I tried.

Elisha has strep. Again.

My head...into the wall...again...

I seriously am about to have a nervous breakdown.

Dovi went back into crisis this afternoon around 5:30.

Blood pressure? 180/130. Not pretty. White as a ghost. Lethargic.

I think he totally freaked out my friend who was over. Frankly, he looked awful.

So we called the doctor, had a chat, and decided to take him in to the ER to do blood work, and take a few x-rays.

It seems that Dovi is quite..ahem...constipated.

"Let's give the Miralax a few more days" said the ER peds attending.

I certainly hope it works quickly, or I might simply lose my mind.

This is getting RIDICULOUS.

Nothing like a little Simcha...

Dovi's camp video came today.

Now we have seen it already-Video Joe brought it when he came to us, and Raphi sent us an underground version of it. But my kids...ahem..mistreat their dvds. So none of them were watchable.

So now the "official" one came. I've told the ungratefuls them that they care not allowed to (a) touch the dvd (b) put it in the dvd player (c) touch the dvd. Hopefully this one will survive.

So as we were watching it, my favorite song came on. It's a Shloime Dachs song, "K'Ish Echad B'Lev Echad". For my nonJewish readers, that means "Like One Person with One Heart"-it's from the words in the Torah (Bible) about how the Jewish people were like one heart and one unit at Mt. Sinai when they got the Torah.

I was trying to figure out why I love it so much. Then I realized why. Dovi's first year at camp, they used that same song as the first song in the video, when they show all the kids getting off the busses and arriving at camp, with looks of joyous happiness on their faces. That first year, when we got the video, we could not believe what we were seeing. So it stuck in my mind. And thus that song is my favorite.

Either way, the video is just what Dovi needed. He needed a little simcha.

He's been laying (lying? correct me, Grammar Steph) on the floor waving his feet in the air. All you counselors, you know what he's doing :)

And btw, Raphi-it is slightly different than the one you have. I especially like the little part with the "dreams do come true" part. And ooooh the havdalah part is nice. If you're reading this, Joe, it's great!

Oops! I haven't updated today!

Thank G-d, we're really on the upswing.

He did have a fever last night around 6pm and did go into crisis YET AGAIN, but he had a much better night overnight and has been watching six hours of Blues Clues continuously taking it easy today and is really feeling MUCH better.

He's SO happy right now-Aharon, his JCC counselor, just so happens to be in town this weekend and came over to visit. So they are playing Wii and Dovi is thrilled.

I ran away from home last night for half an hour and picked up our groceries for next week.

Some lovely friends picked up produce and meat for me yesterday so I was able to cook for Shabbos yesterday afternoon and not put it off until today. It always makes me nervous, when Dovi is sick, to put off ANYTHING until Friday. So luckily all was cooked when I ran away.

Today, I took advantage of my house arrest with Dovs and ironed about 4,000 dress shirts and ordered 15 pairs of Crocs for me and two other friends. For $80. For 15 pairs.

OK that's it for now!

Thank G-d he's really almost completely himself again.

Thank G-d we found something...and why not to mess with Sara after 48 hours of illness...

We went back to the pediatrician at 2:15 today.

Guess what?

Ear Infection! Didn't have it yesterday, but did today. It must have been brewing.

She also felt that he seems to be a bit constipated-the doctor who checked him yesterday isn't his normal doctor and he has this big ole belly and makes it hard to feel around.

So he's on Cefzil and Miralax. Hopefully he'll be good as new tomorrow!!!!

Then we went to CVS to pick up the prescription.

Well accidentally my ped's office called in the prescription under Dovi, not Joseph (his legal name-but that's a story for another day!). So at this CVS, their policy with a new customer is that they put the script aside until the person comes in to, ya know, pick it up, and then they get the insurance information, and only then do they deign to fill it.

Well since it was for Dovi, not Joseph, "wasn't in the system", so they didn't fill it when we got there, 45 minutes after it was called in. It was going to be a 15-30 minute wait.

I was ticked off and told her that I thought this was a stupid policy. Yes, I used the word stupid to her. Then I started to walk away from the counter.

As I did, I turned around and looked at her. Dovi was doing his juicy sounding coughing thing.


"You know, he's probably contagious"


Waddaya know, it was filled in 5 minutes.

Don't mess with me, I tell ya.

Dovi Update...

His blood pressure is still elevated, and he still has a fever.

He hasn't had valium since 4:30 am-yay!

He does seem a little better-but now he's a bit junky sounding-but his lungs were clear yesterday.

I'm actually at work for a few hours while Benjie works from home.

We're heading back to the doctor at 2:15 to get him re-checked out. We're really, really hoping that we find something, anything wrong with him that we can attribute all this nonsense to. (Yes, that's bad grammer. Sorry)

I'm wiped out. Thanks for all your good wishes!

Sleeping

He's sleeping.

I want to clarify a bit more.

Yes, this is crap.

It's scary. I've called a few people freaking out.

But Dovi will be just fine.

Probably by tomorrow. Seriously. Think of us. Think good thoughts.

But this is not cause for hysteria.

Spoke too soon

crappity crap.

Dovi Update

So Dovi slept well over night.

Woke up at 6ish, having gotten meds at 4:30 am.

Went back into crisis at 7 am and had a fever of 102.

Gave 3 mg ibuprofen and 4 mg valium.

Better by 9am.

Took him to the pediatrician. Everything negative.

He seems to be somewhat fine now.

Thanks everyone for your good wishes.

Never, ever have we had to give Dovi four does of valium in 24 hours. Never.

A Bit of Clarification

So I was chatting with someone about my post tonight about Dovi being in crisis.

She was like "What did you mean my that?"

And I said "He's in crisis, what do you mean?"

And then I realized she didn't know what I mean.

So I'll give another recap of Dovi's disease.

Dovi has Familial Dysautonomia (FD). It's one of the Jewish Genetic diseases, just as common as Tay Sachs. Every 1 in 30 Jews of Ashkenazic (Eastern European) origin is a carrier for FD. You might have seen the man on the Colbert Report who mapped his own genome? Well he mentioned that he found that he is a carrier for a disease. That disease is FD.

FD is autosomal recessive. That means that in order for a person to have FD, they must inherit a mutated gene from each parent. Remember Punnet Squares from high school? Big A Little a? Well Benjie and I are Aa and Dovi is aa. Make sense?
The chance for two Aa people to get together is 1:900. (1:30x1:30) and then the chance of those people having a child with FD? 1:3600. (1:900x1:4). Benjie and I should go out and buy some lottery tickets.

Back to FD.

FD is a disease of the autonomic nervous system. Simply put, the autonomic nervous system controls everything that our bodies do automatically-blood pressure, temperature, breathing, swallowing, etc. People with FD? Their autonomic nervous system is not fully developed. So these automatically controlled processes? Don't get so automatically controlled.

In other words, Dovi is messed up.

I don't think there's any other way say it.

Symptoms of FD include:

Unstable temperature
Unstable blood pressure
Diminished sense of heat, cold, and pain-as in Dovi can touch a burning hot pot and not feel it. Or break his leg three times in six months and not feel it.
Scoliosis
Lack of overflow tears
Diminished taste buds
Low muscle tone
Absent suck/swallow reflex
Aspirates all liquids
Developmental Delay
Blotchy skin
Unsteady gait
Dysautonomic Crisis

Yes, Dovi has every. single. one. of. these. terrible. awful. symptoms.

Which brings me to what I was talking about.

Dysautonomic Crisis.

And no, Raphi, Dovi doesn't do crisis. This is his first major crisis in maybe two or three YEARS. I gave myself an Ayin HaRah-an evil eye-in other words, my non-Hebrew readers, I jinxed myself on Sunday night when Raphi was here and I said "Dovi never goes into crisis!"

Hardy har har.

What is Dysautonomic Crisis?

I liken it to a perfect storm. Dovi's autonomic nervous system does not function correctly. When his body is stressed, due to physical illness, emotional stress, or really nothing at all, a person with FD's body can go into a Dysautonomic Crisis.

Symptoms of FD include:

Crazy out of control blood pressure (177/121 anyone?)
Retching
Extra blotchiness
High blood pressure
Retching
Increased heart rate
Fever
Retching
Did I mention retching?
Did I mention high blood pressure?

Poo Dovi, his body just does haywire. Some kids with FD experience prolonged crisis on a daily basis. We're "lucky" - Dovi goes into a minor crisis every morning, which is quickly taken care of by medication, and a crisis like he had tonight? Maybe once every year or so. Have you ever heard of Cyclic Vomiting Syndrome? That's basically what's happening here-except that when Dovi was 3 months old and got his g-tube put in, they also did a procedure called a Fundoplication-essentially wrapping the esophagus around the stomach, making a one way valve to reduce vomiting due to reflux. So when Dovi's in crisis, he retches. a lot.

How to stop crisis?

Valium.
Catapres.

For Dovi, it's all about the Vitamin V. The valium brings his heart rate and blood pressure down and allows his body to "reset" itself. Sometimes he needs Catapres (blood pressure medication) as well to get under control.

So that's what happened tonight. It was very disconcerting for Benjie and I because we're simply no used to him going into crisis like this. He did wake up around 9:30 needing more valium, but hopefully he'll get a good night's sleep and sleep it off.

We'll have to see in the morning what tomorrow will bring.

Have I mentioned recently that FD really sucks?

Wild Times...

Dovi's in crisis now.

As I type.

Blood pressure?

177/122 at 5:10.

162/178 at 5:30 after valium.

OOPS! Shosh just corrected me. It was 162/118, not 162/178. He'd be dead if it was 162/178. Sorry bout that.

Is that considered better???

Good times, I tell ya, good times.

I'm taking a Monday off from Not Me! Monday

because we're all busy hanging with Raphi!

But now I'm adding this in...

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

ok back to my planned post...

because we're hanging with Raphi!





Yes. Dovi's really happy. Especially because Raphi brought him 36 packages of baseball cards. Yes, 36.

So that's our Monday! I've been perfect, just perfect, all week. Nothing to be embarrassed of.

Aside from one thing. Remember how Jacob vomited on my shoes?

Well I would have never, ever, never have worn said shoes to Erev Shira on Wednesday night. Without cleaning off the vomit splatters. That would have been repulsive.

OK it seems I did participate in Not Me! Monday after all.

Taming the kid paper clutter

If you're anything like me, you have a nemesis in your life:

Paper.

My kids bring home insane amounts of paper from school every day. Worksheets, spelling lists, worksheets, forms, worksheets, coloring sheets, and worksheets. You get the idea.

I also have like 8 million papers for our home life.

And the P Family for Dummies binder. Which will be discussed at a later date.

I felt like everywhere I looked, there were more papers piled up. Papers that could not be filed away because they were being actively used. But they didn't need to be lying on my kitchen counter messing up my periodically every so often neat kitchen.

I really want this.It's from Ballard and soooo pretty. But it's also $100. So that's out. I also want the entire Ballard catalog, but that's a whole other story.

So I got to thinking. I need places to put each kids' papers.

OK, file folders. I've seen pretty file folders in the store. But they are like $10 for 5. No way!

I was in the dollar store buying my four Sunday papers to clip coupons , and I saw a package of pretty scrapbook paper for $1 (obviously, it's the dollar store. Everything's $1. It's utopia.) I got to thinking. I currently have file folders at home. Why don't I decoupage this pretty paper on them?

So I did.

I made five of them. Why five, you ask? (woah, this is creepy. My curser has disappeared. I can still type but I don't know where I am. odd) Because I had six pieces of paper. And I needed one piece to decoupage...

the front of the file holder. I had this file folder holder from when I had my office-in-a-closet-which-became-a-crap-pile. But it was black. So I spray painted it cream and decoupaged a little bit of paper on the front to cover the ugly part.

I love it! It's sitting on the corner of my counter. Each kid has a folder, plus a general folder, plus a slot to slide in the P Family for Dummies binder. It's not the gorgeous Ballard thingy, but it cost me $1 in scrap book paper and has solved such a big annoyance in my house.

If you're not crafty you could do the same thing, minus the decoupaging and spray painting.

But that wouldn't be as fun, now, would it?

Fine, Fine. I'm In.

I hereby present to you...

25 Random Things About Me.

Although this fad has been quickly followed by The Mommy Survey so maybe this one isn't kewl anymore.

1) I love eating food. But hate making it. I dream of having a personal chef to make me lots of yummy food. That I didn't have to make.

2) I can tell you the type of car almost every one of my friends drives. And I recognize most car types as they drive by me. And I have no interest whatsoever in cars.

3) I have a big chicken pox scar in the middle of my forehead

4) When I was a teenager I had NO interest in the disabled community. I was not one of those girls volunteering on Sunday mornings at the Keshet Sunday School. Yet here I am.

5) When I get stressed out about Dovi's medical issues, I am seized by the unstoppable desire to paint. A wall. My best decorating projects have been directly correlated to Dovi medical crises. My room? Dovi pneumonia/hospitalization/ambulance ride from Evanston to Childrens. My dining room? Dovi's third broken leg in six months. Den? Dovi's second scoliosis surgery. Kitchen's second color? Dovi's first scoliosis surgery. Told ya so.

6)I am a good finder. Contact lenses, lost papers? I'm your gal.

7) I lay in bed thinking about different permutations of the various coupon deals that are out there and imagining transactions.

8) I hate football. I think it's idiotic.

9) I love building things. I would love to learn how to really use power tools. I'd love to hang drywall.

10) I get immense satisfaction from doing projects in my home myself. I love looking at something and saying "I did that!"

11) I am currently following 193 blogs. Yes, 193.

12) I have run four half marathons. But I have NO desire to run a full marathon. One might think that it's the next natural step, but for me, it's just not.

13) I'm finding myself as more of a morning person and less of a night person the older I get. One morning this week, I had showered, started a load of laundry, and folded the previous day's, and gotten Dovi on the school bus-and it was only 7:15.

14) I met Benjie at a Billy Joel Concert.

15) I knew in my heart of hearts while I was pregnant with Dovi that there was something wrong with him.

16) Conversely, when I was pregnant with ESJ there was no doubt in my mind whatsoever that everything would turn out ok. Even when I was 1 cm dilated at 19 weeks pregnant, I knew that the babies would be fine.

17) I'm bossy. And opinionated. I like things done my way.

18) My second and third toes on both my feet are kind of webbed.

19) I'm incredibly bow-legged.

20) I'm not a makeup girl. Last year, a friend dragged me to the makeup counter at Nordy's. I had not bought real (department store) makeup since before I got married. Yes. I had not bought real makeup in ten years.

21) I've never met anyone famous. Ever. I'm rather boring that way.

22) I didn't go to Disney World until I was over age 30.

23) I'm completely, 100% tone deaf. I'm so tone deaf it's scary. Even Benjie has never heard me sing. That's how bad I am. I'm too embarrassed to sing in front of him.

24) I'd love to learn how to sew. Oh, the things I could make!

25) I always said that blogs were dumb. I mean who wants to read other people's random ramblings?

The Beginning of an Era

Tonight is the beginning of an era.

Tonight, I will take Shana to Erev Shira. Erev Shira is Hebrew for "Night of Song". It's the name for the performance that the girls at each Jewish school in the Chicagoland area put on every year. It is the night that never ends listening to tone deaf children sing and watching kids with two left feet dance a lovely night to enjoy your daughters and nieces as they perform.

At my kids' school, the girls start in third grade. My niece Miri is in third grade. I did a little calculating. Miri is in third grade. My youngest niece Nava is almost three. That means that we have seventeen years of Erev Shira ahead of us. I figured this out because we are now starting Erev Shiras, but Nava won't start hers for seven years. But we'll be going those seven years thanks to Miri, Shana, and Tari. That means we have those seven years plus the ten years until Nava finishes. Total is seventeen years of hell Erev Shira. Oh and if there are any more girls born, which is distinctly possible, we're looking at over twenty years of Erev Shira. I will pay off my house before I finish going to Erev Shira. And, heck, if Miri gets married young, by the time we're done with nieces' and daughters' Erev Shiras, we could start right back up with granddaughters and great nieces! Oh. My. G-d.

Now, now, lest you all think I'm a really meany, I will love Erev Shira. Miri is a joy, she is the darned cutest sweetest kid ever. I love her. And therefore I will love Erev Shira. The same will be said for all Erev Shiras to come. But yikes! Seventeen years? Oy.

And let me tell you, Erev Shira is not for the faint of heart. Here are the rules I have been told:

• change your daughter before you take her to be in the audience. Never, never let her go in her uniform.
  
• preferably put her in her cutest, most fashionable outfit. Brand names a plus.
• make sure her hair is done.
• make sure you look fab.
• never, ever wear a tichel or snood. For my non Orthodox readers, enjoy the visual aids.
  

• NO GIFTS! Previously, people would bring all manner of presents for their little actresses-flowers, balloons, jewelery, electronics. I'm not joking. So there is a strict rule. No gifts. Good thing I asked or else I would be the one there with a huge bouquet of flowers for Miri.

Wish us luck tonight. We're going to need it.

Ahhh the camera works...

So today you're getting pictures of my ever so growing stockpile of food and toiletries in my basement thanks to my recent insanity couponing ways.

The first thing I did was clear off all three shelving units and move them into this little alcove in the scary slasher basement. I also reassembled this wire drawer tower thingy I had gotten from Ikea like ten years ago. It originally held Dovi's toys, but has held many different items as the years have gone by. Now it's holding the toiletry store. I'm not joking.

So here you are!


A general picture of everything

Yes, that's 58 boxes of cereal. We've gone through about 30 so far. I think there were 80 when we started out after the crazy sale. And that's after donating 50 boxes to the food pantry. Top shelf is random food items that I only have one of. Oh and eight boxes of popcorn that I got for free yesterday.


A better view-the bottom shelves are food items and condiments-manwich (twelve cans for $1-we go through at least two cans every other week-it's like our favorite dinner!), tomato sauce, syrup, peanut butter, pasta etc etc etc. Top shelves are snacks-fruit rolls, chex mix, south beach bars, pudding, crackers, and cookies.

Another closeup

On the top shelf are seven bags of wipes, second shelf is cleaning supplies, third is paper goods, fourth is soda, and bottom shelf/wall is Dovi formula. Just got a delivery yesterday so there's a ton there.

The toiletry store.
Top is toilet paper
Top bin is toothpaste and mouthwash
Second bin is medicine/first aid/eye drops/ointment
Third bin is deodorant and something else
Fourth bin is personal care-cotton balls, razors, etc.
Fifth bin is broken-any idea how to reattach a glider thingy? Well first I'd need to find it.
Sixth bin is shampoo
Seventh bin is soaps (I have like 20 of the Johnson's Buddies Soaps-my kid will be using them until their Bar and Bat Mitzvahs!)
Eighth bin is feminine stuff.

I'm sooooo proud.
It took me a few hours but it seriously makes me twitch with joy just looking at it.

Not Me! Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

Hmmmm it was actually a fairly boring week here in my house...but I'm sure I can pull some Not Me Nonsense out of my hat....


OK here we go:

It was not me! who was literally vomited ON my her six year old.

I did not thank my lucky stars that I have somewhat quick reflexes, thus avoiding him vomiting into my mouth. Which would have happened had I not jumped back.

It was not me who did NOT notice some vomit on her shoes that she had been wearing on the fateful Friday vomit.

I did not just put them down, walk away, and tell myself that I would deal with it later.

I am not considering just throwing away the shoes rather than wipe off the 3 specks of puke.

I do not think that I am focusing waaaay too much on the vomit incident.


It was not me! who told the pharmacist that, no, I did not want to pick up Elisha's prescription, only Jacob's. He did not look at me like I was a lunatic only getting one child's medication.

It was not me! who made my hubby go pick up Elisha's prescription from Dominicks today, after I'd gone to pick up Jacob's an hour prior.

It was not because I wanted to get a second Dominicks gift card to fully get all I could from the strep scrounge in my house.

It is not me who keeps using the word scrounge even though it is not the correct word.

My sister told me it's scourge or something but I think scrounge sounds better.

But I have no idea what the word scrounge means.

I did not take the "limit one gift card per person" very literally.


It was not me! who spent 15 minutes Sunday morning decoupaging file folders. What kind of lunatic decoupages FILE FOLDERS? Have I nothing better to do with my time?

It was also not me who did not do one darned thing on her to-do list on Sunday-reorganize the scary slasher basement, do paperwork.

I did not spend the majority of Sunday laying on the couch reading blogs.


Benjie did not just catch me reading my own blog.

And then he did not start dictating a Not Me! Monday post about it.

And he did not look over and see me writing these very words.

Umm Remember

How my bets were on Jacob for the next to fall victim to the Great Strep Scrounge of 2009?

Well it might have been more useful to bet on both Jacob and Elisha.

Positive strep tests on Friday.

I got the idea that a strep test might be in order when Jacob vomited on me on Friday.

Yes, on my legs. He told me his tummy and throat hurt.

I said "Open your mouth so I can see if your throat is red"

He understood that as "Open your mouth and vomit an entire bag of Bissli all over the kitchen floor and Mommy's legs and feet"

Good thing I was wearing tights at the time.

Why I Love Camp Simcha Special

Reason 485,683:

Raphi is coming!!!
Dovi is getting an extra special visitor here in Chicago over President's Day weekend.
We can't wait.
Raphi, you're the best, even though you cheat in marathoning.




I hope you share all these quality photos with future shidduchim.
:)

All This Can Be Yours

For $8 Pretend Dollars

That would be:

8 Johnson's Buddies soaps for the ungrateful hoodlums kids
6 boxes of Kleenex (my only non-thrifty indulgence-the cube boxes of tissues. I know, Shosh. The insanity!!)
1 Kids Colgate Toothpaste
5 3 packs of Irish Spring Soap (only 4 are pictured because Benjie snagged one before I could get the picture)
1 travel pack Excedrin
3 bottles of Softsoap
L'Oreal Foundation
L'Oreal lip gloss
(close your eye, CSS guys) 2 packs...ahem...feminine care products
1 bottle eye drops for The Boy ($9 on its own!!)
2 Right Guard Deodorants for Benjie
1 large bottle Head and Shoulders
1 bottle Garnier shampoo
2 bottles Triaminic
2 boxes Johnson and Johnson's gauze pads with Neosporin built in
1 box Zucol cold lozenges
2 packages Revlon (or is it L'Oreal?) facial cleansing towelettes

And I say pretend because that money was paid with my gift card to CVS from the insane prescription filling madness in our house.

In the spirit of full disclosure I must say that I did pay $36 out of pocket at Walgreens. But I got back $10 towards a future purchase and will be getting back $32 in Mail In Rebates. So it's actually that Walgreens paid me $6 to take a bunch of stuff out of the store.


Don't all my free products look all happy and luxurious reclining on my bed? Oh let's look at them again. And revel in the fact that I actually made my bed this morning.

When The Dovi is Sick

The Momma does organize.

I have told Benjie many a time-when the house is clean and organized, my heart is happy and peaceful.

Well my den has been a sty recently.

It seems that it was not enough of a sty to...ummm...get my butt off the couch in the evening to clean it. But it irked me. But I suffer form inertia in the evenings. And said intertia extends to my lack of desire to organize the scary slasher basement. It's so scary. And a disaster.

So yesterday, I was home with the fake strepalicious Dovi. And I am inspired to clean and organize in the daytime.

So...here is the toy/office closet before. Toys on shelves, home office in those lovely white file thingies on the bottom. Ahh the joys of your youngest(s) being 6 and understanding to not go in the files.



It makes me twitchy just looking at the disaster and precariously balanced piles of paper. A full view of the disaster

Aack. That's all I can say. Oh and Dovi? He stayed in his pjs all day. And watched Blues Clues (yes, he's 11. Shut up. He has FD. Blue makes him happy. Deal with it) no less than six of the eight hours we were home. In my defense, I did make him sit and read for ten minutes, and he played Wii for a while. But otherwise? What you see in the picture is what you get.

Oh by the way-do you like my red walls? Painted them myself. Took (I'm not joking here) FIVE coats of that red paint on top of tinted primer. The fugly paneling just sucked up that paint. And there are still places that it's not even. But remember? inertia? Obviously doesn't bug me enough to y'know, bring the paint can back up and deal with it.


And now....after THREE, yes THREE hours of cleaning/organizing. You see all the file drawers? Empty. I archived all 2008 into four banker boxes which are currently sitting at the door to the basement waiting for Benjie to shlep them down to the basement. Umm honey?

I

am

happy.

Look! Look how organized it is!! You know it was bad when your cleaning lady thanks you for cleaning it up.


Ahhh. Am happy. very happy. Cue the triumphant music. After the ingrateful hoodlums children got home from school I lectured them about how I had spent THREE HOURS cleaning up their toys and they'd darn better keep. it. neat. We'll see how long that lasts.


Oh and I wouldn't leave you without a craft. Looks pretty snazzy, no? I do like my little plaque-y guy I made with $2 of Dollar Tree stuff, some tissue paper, ribbon, paint, mod podge, and hot glue. Not bad if I might say so myself.

Payback's a You-Know-What

OK I am TOTALLY getting some karmic payback or something.

So you all know my ummm....ahem....recent new couponing insane madness hobby?

And how I was inappropriately pleased that Shana had strep the Monday before we left for Miami because her streppiness "bought" me a $30 gift card to CVS?



Well darn it, in the, what? five days? I've been home, I've been the lucky recipient of two more such gift cards.

Shana has strep again. She finished her antibiotics last Tuesday and was back at the pediatrician on Friday...sure enough, rapid strep test came back positive. Either (a) she never really got better or (b) there was another strep lurker in the house.

I'll give you one guess and the answer is not (b). I really didn't think anyone else had strep-no one was complaining of any illness whatsoever. Well, Dovi does have that pesky little Familial Dysautonomia that makes him all quirky and stinky breathy, but I thought nothing of it-he has that nasty canker sore in his mouth from his braces, remember?(know where this is going??)

So Benjie and I were commenting to each other that The Boy has had no appetite for a week or so now. We don't really pay too much attention, because, well, he is tube fed. I swear, there are some benefits to sick kids. No forcing food or medication down their throat. Just hook up the handy g-tube extension set and off we go.

But it was kind of odd that he had no appetite. So I posed the question of why does Dovi have no appetite? to my trusty parents on my various FD list serves that I frequent.

The general consensus was either (a) infection or (b) constipation. Well the D is definitely not constipated. Trust me.

Then I got to thinking.

Strep is in our house.

Strep is an infection.

Strep causes stinky breath.

hmmmmm.....

So he got a culture tonight. I swear, I am The Strep Whisperer. That darned rapid test was a resounding negative. Then I looked at it. And saw that faint little line. And, much like you cannot be a little bit pregnant, you cannot be a little bit streppy.

So the D is on amoxicillin and tomorrow is my unplanned day off of work. I only work four days a week, so this isn't too tragic, but I do like to tell my boss before I leave work when I am taking off. Oh well, such is life. Email to him had to suffice.

So what's the bet? Who will be the next victim of the scrounge of strep that is winging its way through our house?

My bet's on Jacob.

Not Me! Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

This past week...

I DID NOT RUN ANOTHER HALF MARATHON! Woohoo Me!!!

I did not realize on the morning that I was leaving for Florida that I had some type of leprosy-like rash.

I did not then proceed to ignore it and slather myself in Hydrocortisone and take Benedryl rather than seek medical attention (this seems to be a pattern with me)

While on vacation, I did not wake up every morning by 7am-thank you stinky kids for taking from me the ability to sleep in! (but no fears, most mornings I went back to sleep!)

I did not drag my husband into CVS while in vacation to look for monthly ECB deals that were sold out in Chicago. That would be absolutely ridiculous.

While in Walgreens buying the Hydrocortisone for my leprosy, I did not look there for the monthly free after rebate items I could not find in Chicago.

I did not fall asleep during the Superbowl.

I did not burn my finger one night this week.

I did not burn it by putting my hand into the pot on the stove to take out the piece of dust that settled onto the burning hot oil. What kind of idiot puts her hand into a pot with oil sizzling on the bottom????

Once the blister from said burn had popped, I did not then accidentally drip hot wax from a candle into the open wound on Saturday night.

I do not think that I am sharing way too much in the way of my ailments for this week.

I think it's time to stop now.