Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Mother of the Year.



I think I deserve an award.

Last week was winter vacation. Some slackers people Shosh only take their children on ONE activity. ONE! Blasphemy! It's winter vacation, people. It's the week that, if you don't flee the frozen North to the warm(ish) South, you kill yourself taking your children on outings. Many outings. To places that you don't want to go to so much that you'd rather stick a fork in your eye than go to. But you go.

Because you are Mother of the Year.

Case in point:

Friday/Weekend: Hotel at Teen Convention. Allow small ungrateful children to swim at 10pm on Saturday night.

Monday: Sports Convention thingy. Agree to stand in line for over an hour so children can take five swings in the batting cages (every one of them missed)

Tuesday: Field Museum. Me and about 100,000 of my closest friends. It was wall to wall people in the Ancient Egypt Museum. I texted in the giant life-sized wigwam and attempted to explain to Jacob why not all Eskimos live in igloos, some live in underground homes.

Wednesday: Indoor Water Park. Remember the "poke eye with fork"? Yeah. That's it. I get insanely nervous at these places. And at this one, the lifeguards were more interested in flirting with each other than, y'know , watching the lazy river to make sure my children did not drown.

Thursday: Indoor Jump Place, out to lunch, and The Squeakwal (is that how it's spelled?) in the afternoon. My mom arrived in the evening.

Friday: Out to brunch with my mom


What is wrong with me?

Every day and activity?

Why did I do that? Am I a glutton for punishment?

Or did I simply want to keep them out of the house and try and keep the house relatively clean??????


FunkyFrum said...

We have 26 inches of snow here and I have not gotten out of the house in two days. My kids have destroyed my domicile. The good news is, I did finally clean the refrigerator, so somethign got accomplished.

Rayli said...

I also did a million things with my kids for the past 2 weeks. I was about to lose my mind.... thanks god for school!!!!!!

Miriam said...

Thank you Sara for all of the ideas for self punishment- Ruvie's winter break is coming up in 2 weeks, after our 36 hour trip to Columbus that we are taking (7 hours each way and a wedding a a little sleeping time) there will be plenty of time to torture myself and drag Ruvie and my tired self to tons of loud places. Ruvie's favorites include Chuckie Cheese's (help!) and any other place that involves millions of loud children and beeping machines. =)

chaviva said...

What are you doing this week to reward yourself for all the self induced fork poking torture you endured last week?

Arica said...

When we were in Chicago over the summer, after the first session of camp, I took my kids somewhere fun every single day. That's right. EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. It was insane then but just today my son asked me if we can go to Chicago because we had so much fun there going to all those fun places. So maybe he thinks I am a good Mommy after all....maybe.

Anonymous said...

so, now you can hang your award in your spotless house, but you are too insane to appreciate it!

we restrained ourselves to two measly outings - bowling (and actually, wrong pronoun there because DH chaperoned that trip) and the science museum (but we went at 3 pm to "avoid the crowds"). oh, and one dinner out - where everyone behaved relatively nicely - afterwhich one child said, "this was fun, why do we only eat out once a year?". all DH could do was weakly wave the bill in the child's face...

and i would say, "yay, vacation's over and everyone's back to school...but i'm a teacher...sooooo when's my vacation?

ps thanks for that 3-d picture of dovi - love it!

Shira said...

You're awesome. Did you have coupons for all of these activities?